I for one, am a person whose pet peeve is unattended blogs. I, however, have fallen into that category myself the past few months. I'm being honest and open here. The past few months have been a struggle for me. There's much of my life that I keep very private and do not blog about. My blog has mostly been creative projects and a little bit of the fluffy stuff here and there. The reality is, that's not how life works. There are real issues we face and real things that people deal with. The bad thing is that when you only share the fluffy stuff, others sometimes think your life is always a bed of roses and feel let down that their life is about struggles. The reality is that we all have struggles and face things.
The past few months have been that for me. I've always heard that if your blog is a creative blog then that's what you stick to and post only those things. Well, I've never been one to follow the rules or other people so why start now. My post today is to hopefully encourage someone else who may be going through something or maybe just isn't feeling very creative in your life right now. I know I haven't lately. In fact, I let all of my design teams expire and haven't reapplied for any because of what I've been dealing with. I am not one who can be very creative during times like this. I know for some it's like therapy....not for me. At least not when dealing with something of this magnitude.
I'm going to try and make this as short as I can. Many of you know that about a year and a half ago, I had to have surgery. I had a total hysterectomy. When I went back to my doctor for a follow up a week later, I was hit with the news that they had found cancer in my uterus. I was not prepared for that. To make a long story short, I was seen by an oncologist and thankfully, it was determined that the cancer was localized in the uterus only and was a very slim chance it could have spread and therefore, no further treatment was recommended. Thank God! I am a person of faith and trust in God and I was so thankful to Him for that.
Even though that was the case, I still have to go back to my doctor every three months for a follow up until it's been two years after my surgery. On my last follow up, I finally shared with the doctor some symptoms I've been having for the past few months. I hadn't told anyone except my husband. Like I said, I am a person who believes totally in God and His Word. I am very careful about the words that come out of my mouth and who I tell what to.
As I began to tell my doctor, he said he wanted to order some tests, lab and a CT scan. As he began telling his nurse about what to order, I heard the words "lymph". My first reaction in the natural was my heart jumping to my throat. I knew what that meant. But I also knew that I had been into God's word heavily and I knew what I believed about healing. So I remained strong.
I went through the tests, the lab and the CT scan. When I went for the scan, I can't tell you what I was feeling inside. The fear trying to come on, the feeling that I didn't belong there with all those sick people, the wondering what was going to happen....the waiting....
This was my mainstay during this time. I held tight to the scriptures on healing and health and tried to keep my heart and mind at peace.
And yet, I'm probably the only person to stop and take a picture of the machine! The technician did chuckle a bit but I knew I'd want this picture to serve as a reminder.
So, I waited and waited for the response from my doctor. This past Thursday, I finally received a call that with everything they had done, there was absolutely nothing found, everything came back perfectly clean! He just chalked it all up to "getting older"....HA!!! I know better though. You see, sometimes it's just the fight....it's the fight to get you off track in what you really believe in. The fight to get you to give up in what you're believing God for. That's what we know it was. Thankfully, we passed the test and we are so thankful for a God that wants us to live an abundant life, to the full!
Thank you for allowing me to open up and just be real on this post. I've shared a very personal and private part of my life and I hope in some way, it has encouraged you. If nothing else, you at least know where I've been!
Have a great week! I know I will!